Just Surviving Here, There and Everywhere: September 27 2005

Tena ia tangate,


[Hi All],

Welcome to "the week that was". A totally whimsical,

exciting & profound look at the goings on of Toronto

Pip and his trusty [or should that be musty] sidekick

Mississauga Juju.

Well its been a busy few weeks with "outlaw Paul &

Moira" and of course that dirty four letter word

"work".



Yes the "outlaws are still here, 5 weeks realllllllly

goes fast really it does? They have been travelling

around with "Jujuknowall", this time they have been

searching out relatives in Quebec City [which is

absolutely beautiful and is just like being in France,

so I'm told] and Montreal [which is also beautiful and

the old port area is like being in France, which I

know]. However you do have to put up with the

Quebecois who make the real Frenchies look like

angels. Nothing is translated into any other language

not even road signs, even there car number plate

surrounds read "Je Me Souviens" which translated means

"I Remember". [ie. we haven't forgotten you english

bastards attacked us]? So getting back to relies

really none of Canada or North America mind you is

safe from Juju and her quest to have a relative from

everywhere. Now I have to put up with the "screaming

banshee" who's relatives fought and settled on the

very ground I currently walk and reside. Our apartment

resembles a journalists desk, with maps, genealogy

trees, photo's, maps, history stories. The madness

never ends. I keep threatening to start on my

relatives who were in Nova Scotia for a while, however

"Jujuknowalls" were there first.



I of course can't escape this madness and was over

heard yelling "stop the world I want to get off"

unfortunately this outburst was at 35,000 feet on a

flight to Chicago. After a short discussion with the

travelling "air marshal", yes they do exist, not

helped with me wanting to see his weapon [gun you

sicko, I haven't gone that way yet], so I spent the

rest of the flight handcuffed to my seat. Which made

it very hard to drink my Bloody Mary while searching

for a virgin called Mary, I mean I was flying Virgin

Air and the hostess was called Mary.

They released me once I pleaded, explained that the

"outlaws" had been here for 4 weeks, my blood pressure

pills weren't working,

and obey-one-wive-only [this is a star wars fantasy of

mine, with Princess Lay-her] and that "she who must be

obeyed" was tracking her geological history [not

helped by me explaining that who cares as it was 100's

of years ago and they are dead anyway, which is what

I'll be if I keep that approach going].



Speaking of pills I got them mixed up the other night

while in my hotel room after realising that I was in

Chicago on my own and away from my "living hell" [its

not that bad really], sense's heightened by the fact

that the hotel I stay at is also used by airline crew

[including Mary from Virgin, who definitely isn't],

and not to mention I had had a few quiet rums. So

instead of taking my blood pressure pills I took

Viagra. So I spent the whole night with a raging I

mean racing heart, there was one benefit though and

that was that there was absolutely no chance of me

falling out of bed???



I'll give you a run down on my week, so you can feel

for me and then there will be an outpouring of

sympathy and many donations to the save the "Toronto

Pip Fund".



Monday.

Morning, Toronto, work.

Afternoon, fly Detroit, couple of meetings.

Evening, fly to Chicago.



Tuesday. Chicago.

Morning, meetings, driving around central city

architects etc.

Afternoon, as above.

Evening, hotel bar, airline hostesses, dinner etc etc.



Wednesday.

Morning, meetings. Driving around flooring contractors

which make Hills Flooring's look like a small

non-event.

Afternoon as above.

Evening, fly to Detroit, back to Toronto.

Walk in door at home 2.30am Thursday [no wife, busy

chasing dead people].



Thursday,

AM. Collect McGregor from his best friends house, all

day in office.



Friday,

AM. Office.

PM. McGregor & I drive to Montreal [545km in 4hrs]

YeeHaaaaaaaaaaa you got to love the straight roads and

130km speed limit [unofficial]. Great hotel in middle

of Montreal [thanks "outlaw Moira & Paul"



Saturday,

ARRRRRGGGGGG WE VISITED ANOTHER BLOODY LAKE. Well

actually and technically it is the St-Laurent seaway

which runs from the Atlantic to lake Ontario, [I said

to Juju that if she really wants to track the

ancestor's she should do this in a kayak]. My life

expectancy shortened once again, getting very good at

sleeping with one eye open?

Stayed in another magnificent B&B, when we get back to

NZ [3 years] we are seriously thinking of opening one.



That's all for now, Matt & Linda [brother &

Sister-in-law] are here on Friday. So that will be a

good reason & grounds for a big night on the truth

serum, and needless to say ammunition for the next

"week that was".



So bye for now, I know you all miss me, oh I'm getting

all teary eyed, [eh right, tui add]

Love to all

Toronto Pip.